A new confession

Rather like Bertie Wooster taking up the ukelele, I have succumbed to an enthusiasm that annoys those close to me. More embarrassing still, it is for the entertainer known as Mika, who pleases me exceptionally. I feel I must defend myself hence am provoked to offer the usual 13 reasons why je suis séduit.

13. How can you dislike someone who makes so many people happy?

12. He has a terrific voice.

11. He is more than a musician but a theatric entertainer, a weird supercharged amalgam of Sinatra, Michael Jackson and Freddie Mercury. His concert at the Olympia Paris last year (available on DVD with much else) was historic. I know this sounds like hyperbole but watch it for yourself.

10. Maybe he doesn’t yet and probably never will dance as well as Michael Jackson used to – but he has plenty of energy and I reckon he’s working on his steps.

9. He is the only person in recent memory to have made Croydon amusing, in the bouncing, beautiful, funny, touching video for Big Girl (You Are Beautiful). This film made in the Croydon marketplace and on the high street, and co-starring hundreds of local extras, is a rival for Elton John’s I’m Still Standing, as one of the great, happy, stomping on-location dance videos of all time. (I can feel mes proches groan.)

8. Mika may have had a confused education but he is not stupid. His work is pop but classically referenced pop – from Grace Kelley to Freddie Mercury and the chairman of the board. If it is schlock, it is really high-class schlock.

7. If he’s gay – so what? It is probably more nuanced than that. So what? again.

6. He’s funny because he’s a bit tortured. He says he was bullied at school (Lycée Français CDG in London, as it happens). I can imagine he might have been somewhat precious. Musicians are often weird, hence often bullied. Having failed to kill the artist, this can make him stronger. It’s no good being not odd if you want to make art.

5. Something about his story doesn’t quite add up. His official biography is a bit – difficult. I don’t mind a bit of mystery, though.

4. He has surrounded himself with terrifically creative people and creates great collaborative performances with them. While remaining indisputably the star.

3. He speaks French.

2. He includes a beautiful , funny shot of a Muslim woman in the Croydon video of Big Girl (etc.). I am sure this was highly intentioned.

1. I wish he would make a video in my garden. And he should bring the Big Girls.